Two people meet and fall in love and find themselves in wedded bliss. Then forgetting what made the relationship work so well during the courting process, the couple become critical of one another's shortcomings.
Somehow there are new superhuman standards to be met and when they aren't met, not only does the criticism start but so does the pettiness and other hurtful actions that drive people apart.
It is hard to accept that our partner sometimes makes wonderful decisions and sometimes makes bad ones. That sometimes our partner is a joy to be with and other times becomes depressed or distant or irritating.
Sometimes we have good days and other times bad days in which nothing seems to go right and we become angry and defensive, often striking out at those who are closest to us, ironically the ones whose understanding we need the most.
At times even with the best of intentions we do something selfish or we just make mistakes. That's life when you are human and is essential to our path for personal growth as we learn from our human experiences.
What we need from our partner is love and patience. We need understanding and we need compassion and forgiveness.
Anne and I have been married for 48 years and we have also learned to give each other respect and our individual space. It took a long time to learn but we also avoid saying hurtful things, things that can't be taken back at less emotional times.
It is wonderful to be human.
For it is wonderful to be in love and be loved, wonderful to experience new things and to learn and grow and wonderful to grow beyond one's ego in the process of becoming more spiritual and giving.
But to do this requires a lifetime of mistakes which lead to a lifetime of growth. And ideally to experience all that life has to offer with your loving partner by your side, as you accept each other's shortcomings and allow each other to grow and become who each of you was meant to be.
Dick
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