"He (or she) ruined my life!" How often have we heard those bitter words from someone who refuses to forgive, as through their anger, they attempt to make those words a self-fulfilling prophecy.
But no-one can ruin our lives, other than ourselves.
HBO Real Sports televised a story in which a professional football player hired a hitman to kill his pregnant girlfriend when she refused to have an abortion.
The hitman killed her, but she lived long enough to identify her boyfriend and for doctors to save her baby boy.
Both men are serving long prison sentences, but here is the most compelling part of the story:
Her mother forgave them, a remarkable act that brought tears to this hardened hitman's eyes.
And as a single grandmother, she is raising this child, a loving little boy who was brain damaged from the shooting and death of his mother, as he was deprived of oxygen.
This grandmother didn't proclaim that her life was ruined. Instead she freed herself from bitterness and anger through forgiveness and is now concentrating her love and attention on this child.
Forgiveness is a choice, and as in this case, it may require great strength.
But it is the only way to avoid imprisonong ourselves into miserable lives, as we find love and compassion from the deepest part of ourselves and let go of the bitterness.
Dick
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